Tired is one way to ignore the isolation

Last night I ran some utilities on a mail server and stayed up very late. I slept late enough this morning, but have been tired all day. Feeling tired has the effect of diverting my attention from the isolation. I'm not good company when I'm tired. And the things that have to be done take longer so there is less time to think. Right now I'm just about ready to crawl into bed with the crossword puzzle.

The transplant drugs are gradually being tapered away. I like taking fewer pills all the time. The taper is for two different drugs and changes on different days, so I've resorted to consulting the calendar every time I load up the pill dish. It's nice to think that I will not have to refill these two scrips again. They are not the most expensive, but they are the second and third most expensive so I'm happy to be crossing them off the list.

The neupogen shot that I got yesterday should increase the white blood cells. I don't know much about how neupogen works, but it seems to know what it is supposed to do for each individual bloodstream that it hits. I still have a visible rash over most of my body, but it doesn't itch. However, my mouth is more tender which is part of graft vs. host, and means I need to rinse more often with saline water.

Hayward is still taking his pills. He is eating, but only treats. He isn't interested in regular food. I'm not sure whether this is a taste he has acquired, or if something about his food is genuinely distasteful because he is sick. He is 11 years old and he has eaten the same dog food for all of his 11 years. On the other hand, he likes treats a lot. He has chewed a rawhide stick after meals today and that's another improvement.

Hayward is a 95# black Labrador Retriever with a "pork tenderloin" tail that can clear a coffee table in 2 seconds flat, hit the walls so hard the pictures slide crookedly, and bruise your leg while he's expressing how happy he is to see you. Labs are never full, and they look at you with big sad eyes when the food bowl is empty. When Hayward was a puppy I started giving him a small piece of rawhide when he returned the empty food bowl to me. It signaled the end of the food and distracted him. (I guess.) He would take the piece of rawhide and bound to the top of a half flight of stairs. Then he tossed it in the air and caught it, pawed it on the floor and pounced on it. Occasionally he even tossed it down the stairs, then skidded down to catch it before it stopped. This little routine has continued for his whole life.

So you see, when he didn't wag his tail, or want a rawhide chew, we knew he was really feeling bad. Through the years I have marveled at his constitution which has survived eating all sorts of things that are traditionally bad for dogs. One time he ate a 2# box of See's Chocolates, filched from my brother-in-law's suitcase. Another time a dozen Krispy Kreme donuts...leaving the box so untouched, we thought one of the house guests had snuck in when we weren't looking. He is sometimes discriminating, choosing to eat only the strawberry licorice and not the raspberry. Perhaps the funniest event was a large bucket of runts (little fruit shaped, fruit flavored candies) wrapped in Christmas paper under the tree. He ate them all except the bananas.

So hopefully by Thursday, Hayward and I will both have better reports.
Cathi