Sunday, February 14, 2010

Just not yet.

Mark came for a visit this weekend and it was really nice to be able to do things with him and for him. This is the first visit where I've been healthy enough to do much with him. We went to Louisburg Cider Mill today and I actually went inside the little country store. When we went in October I had to stay outside because there were too many people inside. I had to drink root beer because the cider is unpasteurized. But today was different and very pleasant in the snow. The little store with its shelves of homemade jams and chutneys, soup mixes and apple cider pancake mix was warm and homey in the cold weather.

Daisy came along with Mark for a visit and she remains charming as ever. I took some fine pictures of her but I forgot my camera at Mom's this evening so no photos with this post. I hate not being able to pet her and play with her. She camps in the corner where her kennel used to be and I wish she could camp for longer.

I bought one of those pill caddies with a spot for morning and evening pills. And all my pills fit in the compartments. There's a milestone! I remember parceling them out into a dessert dish at Mom's house and there was literally a pile. So this is nice. I can take them all with one glass of orange juice (or Gatorade at night.)

I am still frustrated by the lack of strength in my arms. Tonight at Mom's I was trying to help her with dinner and I struggled to hold the pan with two hands. I couldn't fold the afghan neatly after I used it because I have no strength when my arms are raised. More weights. More weights.

I went to a yoga class at the Cancer Action Center Friday and it was interesting. The poses were for the most part much more complicated than I can manage. I can't balance on one knee--I can only barely kneel. And when I kneel my mind is reeling at the idea that I will have to get back up. I must keep doing these things until I can do them without thinking. Right now there are sheets to be folded and the effort seems overwhelming.

The overall aches seem to be less so I am surprised by these tasks that I struggle to perform. But it's always "yet." I simply can't do them yet.
~Cathi

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I had to laugh at your yoga paragraph. I've always considered myself a pretty physically fit person and I have to tell you I struggle with the same yoga poses!! I'm not sure it has anything to do with you being "weak" from sickness! I love doing yoga because it forces me to relax (that's the key to the poses) and think about just relaxing. Keep at it because it will get better! Practicing them on Wii Fit is very helpful and you can hold on and fall and no one will be there to laugh or make fun of you!

Much love to you!
Mags

Anonymous said...

Your teeth, your eyes,your face.you look so well and happy.You are one bad ass Lady,Girlfriend. Loving you Nedra Lou