Some cheese to go with that whine?

It's been a rough weekend; and I'm not talking about football. I've had the runs, my stomach has been upset, sorta takes the git up and go outta me. and I'm going to whine.

My vision is blurry, my hearing not up to usual. This is the prednisone and/or dry eyes. I have some artificial tears which don't seem to make enough difference to matter. There is very little hair on my head so I wear some kind of hat all the time to keep from sticking to the back of the chair. Sometimes the hat is hot or uncomfortable or both. And I have hot flashes which make my entire back stick to the chair!

My feet tingle. This varies by the day and night. Sometimes at night the tops tingle so much it keeps me awake. It feels sort of like cold but more covers don't make it warm. I wear socks to bed and put a quilt over my feet. The extra weight from the quilt seems to help. But really it's better when for whatever reason, the tingling subsides. This is from the chemo and may or may not go away.

Food tastes funny. And it depends on the day too. Right now I have a new box of Christopher Elbow chocolates and chocolate does not sound good at all. The funny taste goes for drinks too. Water sometimes just will not go down. I switch to Gatorade or Crystal Light then. But still I can't seem to drink enough.

I have a lot of trouble sleeping. I'm nervous of too many drugs but I try a lot of different things to get some sleep. Sometimes I can't sleep because I'm sick--I spend a lot of time in the bathroom or something. Sometimes I just can't sleep. I try reading and crosswords but refer to the blurry vision (which also applies to the closed captions on the TV.)

I still can't seem to eat much fresh food without consequences in my gut. I got a new scrip today which seems to be helping but it tastes totally nasty. It's something mixed in corn oil and it's hard to get the taste out of my mouth.

My left shoulder and arm don't work right. I can't lift any real weight with it. I think this is because of the PICC line and the blood clots; the docs think there might be some damage to my rotator cuff, which of course can't be dealt with til this is all over.

I take a slew of pills. Granted this is much easier now than it was fresh out of the hospital. In reality I don't gag anymore. Nevertheless, I dread taking them just as much. The physical memory of the gagging has not gone away. Adding this oil stuff is just appalling.

My blood sugar is erratic. I'll be asking about that tomorrow. My blood pressure is high, and normally it's very low. This could be the current drug regime or it could be the prednisone.

I am still isolated and restricted. I can't go where there are crowds and dirt. Everyone who comes in here has to be vetted. I don't have much energy to go anyway. I am missing weddings and birthdays and parties and new restaurants and plays in the theatres.

And that's just how I feel today. Out of energy. I'm not out of optimism even though this is a bag of whining. My friend Sharlyne was here yesterday afternoon and spent the night and was good company. Friend Sally brought supper over with lots of treats. Brother Walt is coming to spend the night tonight. Sistah Trish is coming tomorrow and spending the night. I am sure that coupled with getting my gut settled down, these new faces will freshen my outlook.